Letter to Mom&Dad - 12/9/05

It's been 2 weeks since I've talked to anyone outside of village and it's taken a surprising toll. I decided not to call anyone last weekend under the belief that we'd have phone lines in To this week. Alas, it wasn't so. So this last week, I've had a few days where I struggled and really felt unsatisfied with work here. I know it was a product of built up tension that grows surprisingly fast.

There have been moments of satisfaction, like going to the elementary school and teaching about hygiene and good sanitary habits. But some of the projects I keep hoping to get off the ground keep sputtering. Sometimes due, it seems, to the quality of persons and sometimes due to mis-communication. Those have been my frustrations. I had high hopes of starting a discussion group with the high schoolers here, but realizing they're really not interested in talking about sexual problems openly was disappointing. The ones who did were even more disappointing for their lack of maturity. So, I'm continuing with the project, but with less enthusiasm.

I am teaching English one hour a week. Every student, which there are 3 adults, is very eager and I'm content to continue with that. I found my French is improving, if ever so slightly and my comprehension is definitely improving in both French and Moore.

There have been good moments, thankfully following the bad ones with the high school students. I actually feel as if I'm gaining some friends who I've come to rely on more here. I hope those relationships continue in a good way. Also, I cooked! It's true! I made a great big pot of soup with a melange of everything that I could find vegetable-wise here and spices. Really experimental on my part, but it mostly consisted of cabbage. From what I remember throwing in there, here is the recipe:
5 small tomatoes (chopped)
3/4 head of cabbage
2 handfuls of lentils
4 small onion heads (I think they were onions! :)
3 or 4 cloves of garlic
3 or 4 dried hot peppers
1 packet of chicken noodle soup (ready made)
2 or 3 pinches each of red chili powder, salt and black pepper
3 pinches of basil
2 1/2 liters of water

I tossed everything in as I was tasting it. It came out pretty good. I let it simmer for a while. After I was good and full, I gave the rest to my neighbor, my counterpart. She loved it and wants the recipe, but I started telling her and she soon lost interest, but told me to make it again. It was kinda an expensive meal, so I'll wait a little and next time I'll toss in some meat and/or potatoes, if I can find 'em.

Next thing I'll try is a three-layer cake, preceded by a 4 course meal, including shrimp and lobster, with a nice cup of red wine, maybe a Shiraz or a Cabornet. What do you think? :) I know, I know, red wine doesn't go with fish. Okay. I'll get a nice Buffalo steak from the organic market down the road next to Starbucks.
:) He He!
Not so much. I think I'll just shoot for a nice PBJ sandwich with the peanut butter and mom's peach jam that I have left over from the care packages.

Have I told you of the delightful movie theater we have down the path from my house?

PAUSE: A sheep just came into my courtyard as I was writing and BAAAH'ed reaaly loud and scared the living hell out of me. Dropped pen, paper, everything. I had a good laugh. The sheep promptly left.

Onward: The delighful movie theater (television run by car battery with faulty speakers) shows an incredible variety of movies, as long as they involve Kung Fu. I've actually become somewhat of a regular attendee, well as long as the movies have Jet Li or Jackie Chen (a girls got to have her standards.) They're a nice break to the monotony of going home and reading a book by lamplight. I'm still waiting on a guy to finish putting in electricity, it's been over a month now since he started. Anyhoo, the movies are a nice respite and they're all dubbed in French, so I don't really understand all of them yet; they speak too quickly.

As you can tell in this letter, I definitely have my ups and downs. A few days ago I was definitely down, but today I'm better. I'm looking forward to talking to folks either tomorrow or Sunday. I really need to. That's probably been the hardest thing here so far. I don't have the advantage of neighboring volunteers 10-20km away I can go and relax with on any day. I have the phone line 15km away I can get to only on Sundays or weekends. When I don't do that, I can tell a difference in how my attitude toward being here is affected. I'll try not to let another weekend pass without chatting with someone again.

Hope you have a great New Year. Miss you and hopefully see you in June.
Love, Laura

Letter to Joe & Kerry - 11/28/05

How's it going? I'm currently enjoying some of the new pens that have arrived in the mail. Those have been a nice surprise along with all the other goodies that come. Coming back from Ouaga was a mixed experience. I made the bush taxi station in time for departure, easy enough, but it ended up leaving an hour and 1/2 late. Seemingly stopping at every opportunity to pick up another passenger along the way. Even the ones who seeminly walk literally out of the bush in the middle of nowhere. Normally I wouldn't mind, but I had scheduled an English lesson at 4 o'clock that afternoon planning on a 4 hour drive. Never again plan that way in Africa. One place we stopped for an hour for the driver and folks to have lunch. Ugh. The folks were nice regardless and got a kick out of me speaking Moore with them. During one of the lulls in conversation, I noticed the radio was playing "God Rest Ye Merry Gentlemen," an orchestra version. I stopped and hummed a few bars with my eyes closed, thinking of that song in church and trying to feel the nip at my skin from the cold December night as we would all go to Christmas Eve mass together. I opened my eyes again and felt the sun on my face instead. The weather here is seemingly non-changing day-in, day-out. It's pleasant in that it's reliable, but boring in it's description except that it's hot and dusty and will be like that for the next 6 months, but even more so!

Thanksgiving in Ouaga was a pleasant affair, eventually for me (after my bout of G.I.) and everyone enjoyed the festivities. The American Embassy usually holds a grand feast, but this year a good number of volunteers stayed at the hostel and cooked for ourselves. Everything came out great, just not at the same time. So we ate over the course of 2 hours, just not continuously. The cooks were fabulous and much appreciated for their hard work. Instead of sitting down and watching a game of football, we all socialized, glad to be in the company of familiar faces again, if only for a night or two.

I was worried when I arrived sick that my entire weekend would be ruined, but no. Blessed by chance I got treated immediately and within 5 hours felt human enought to socialize and continue to enjoy my stay. I stayed an extra day in hopes of doing research I couldn't do on the day I was sick, bud didn't get much leeway anyway. Upon finally returning from Ouaga, just in time for my class, I notice my camera is missing from my bag. Yep. At some point in our many stops and my inattention to my articles I thought were safe on top of the bus, somebody riffled through and stole my camera. I was initially pissed, but of all the things they could have taken that was of value that was the least. In the same bag was my passport, all money for the nex monthes wages and my checkbook. These would have been much harder to take missing than the camera. There weren't that many memorable photos on it anyway and I've had it for th past 5 or 6 years. I'll look for another one when I get back to the states in June. By then I hope to have made some genuine local friends that I will want to take a picture of. I gues until then, I'll have to get cracking on my sketches :) Hope you enjoy the one I put in.

{NOTE: I need to find a way to scan the picture!! I'll post it when I can.}

Take care and Merry Christmas!
Love, Laura

Things that kick @$$

I know some folks are at a loss as to what to send me, well I made a list of things that kick ass and I'll post it next. First off, I'm still extremely grateful to anyone who sends me anything. I really do enjoy every post-it note or object sent.
But here's a little guidance and this isn't a complaint, it's just what I prefer, and don't let this hinder your imagination on items. There's no particular order.

Things that Kick Ass AND Travel well:
-LETTERS-except this one
-Protein bars **see below**
-Boxed, bagged, or canned meat
-Chunky soup/Stag Chili
-M&M's-all types
-Skittles
-peanut butter
-trail mix w/M&M's and raisins
-sauce packets--i.e. salsa, BBQ, mayonaise, nutrasweet, ketchup, mustard..etc.
-Books/mags/photos
-soup packets
-Mom's peach jam
-hotel accessories
-tupper ware containers
-dried fruit packets
-crystal lite packets
-friends/family---;-)~ Come on, I dare you!

Things that Kick Ass, BUT don't Travel well:
-Ghiraldeli's chocolate-I will drink happily regardless
-candy bars/p. butter cups-Ditto, and don't let that stop you from sending them
-**Chocolate Power Bars**-they are a bitch to get out of the wrapper

Things that Kick Ass, but I don't Need:
-Chewing gum-that's covered for the next two years, thank you
-Canned peanuts-plenty of regular peanuts here, but no P.B.-go figure.
-Cocoa Mix
-hard candy-I just don't eat hard sugar candy that much
-Hand sanitizer-Peace Corps provides as much as I want
-Vienna Sausage-For some reason, my stomach says "NO!" and so I feed it to my cat, who kicks ass, by the way

Things that Kick Ass and I'd like periodically: *-denotes soon
-*Q-tips
-*mechanical pencils
-*Nutragena deep clean gentl scrub
-*Omega-3 fatty acids-fish oil tablets
-Glucosamine/Chondrotin tablets
-One a days for women
-annual calender for my wall----Dad?
-Jack Daniels whiskey---:-)~---I dare you to try that
-Metamucile
-batteries AA

Things that would Kick Ass to have:
-a map of the world
-therma rest---mom, there's one in storage
-little photo album
-knife sharpener
-little speakers
-foam ear plugs
-Cuban Cigars(or any cigar actually)

Viola! I hope this helps those who are wondering and for those who weren't, um, I guess it's just FYI.
Have a great Xmas.

Merry Xmas

Hey guys, Merry Xmas, I hope you guys are all having a great holiday and you have safe travel if you heading somewhere. I'm heading to a village to spend some time with some fellow volunteers, who are great cooks by the way, but don't think that's the only reason I'm going. They are some great chics too.

Things are going well here. Health has been good and I'm starting a to hang with some decent folks that I consider more than acquaintances and more as friends now. I getting better at my job in the Maternity, and still seeing things at the clinic that sometimes defy explanation. With my projects outstide the clinic, with the school and village health agents. Those are coming along, slowly. I'm learning to be more patient and expect things not to work the first time, but maybe the third or fourth. I've started cooking! Just soup, really. But for me that's a big step. If you want to eat LC Burkina style, I'll post the recipe and you too can share in the tasty concoction I will call "Soupe de Nasara" or "whitey's soup".

The last two weeks have been good in the regard that I feel like I'm starting to make my house a home. I am painting the courtyard walls and have a grand mural masterpiece in mind for the main wall, but since I'm here for a while, it's a ambitious. I bought new thatch for my porch and outdoor hangar of my house. I'm waiting for it to be put up for me, because I "obviously" can't do it, because I'm female nasara. Oh, well, so I am learning patience with that aspect of Burkina Culture as well. I also spurged and paid for electricity to be connected to my house. That was a test of patience also, because it took the guy 2 months to do it and another 2 weeks to get the bill to me. Alas, I have current and at night I can read legibly and do work I couldn't during the day. However, during the day the current comes on randomly like from 11-1 and then 4-5pm and again at 6-10pm. Definitely better than nothing, so I'm content.
I'm working on firing my housemaid, sounds mean, but of all the people in my village, we just don't get along, she's not respectful, and I don't really think she does a good job anyway. And, according to my counterpart, I pay her way too much for the amount of work she does do. The only reason I haven't fired her before is because her dad is my only local neighbor and so I have to be careful not to alienate him and his entire family. ugh. I "inherited" her from the previousl PCV, but I don't need her and like cleaning my own house actually(yes, Mom, it's true, despite my years of slovenliness).
There's been some changes in my schedule but not much. Supposedly, my village will be getting a telephone land-line "toute de suite"-immediately, but that has been 2 months ago, so when I get it I'll give the number and some phrases you can use to ask for me or leave a message with the telecenter person. They'll know me, so it won't be a big deal to leave a message, and in the mean time you can learn some french and moore. Good times.
I heard that some people have sent packages and they were sent back, ugh. I hate to hear that, but I think you all got reimbursed by the post office right? Thanks anyway for good intention and hopefully you can try again soon. I talked with some other PCV's and they said that they had family and friends say the same thing. Obviously, it happened more that one day and unfortunately for a the majority of PCV's here, there are no packages awaiting them for Xmas. I haven't seen my mail, but there's a list that says I got at least one, so I'm pretty psyched all the same. I'll share as much as I can.
I'm going to end this one here so I can start another one. Other than that Merry Xmas and Happy New Year, I hope you all have an excellent holiday I hope to talk to as many people as I can to wish you the same. Take care.
L

Letter to Hedlund's - Nov 30

The pics are great and I can't wait for the next batch. However, my camera was stolen, so no more pictures for a while. I think I'll wait until I get back to the states in June to get another. There aren't any decent one's here to invest in.

My schedule is filling and hopefully my work will improve even more. I've started working with the local high school forming a monthly sensibilization class, along with scheduling small group discussions that are going to meet bi-weekly. We'll be discussing AIDS, condoms, pregnancy, and feminine rights in the sensibilization. In the petite groups, we'll probably end up talking about sex, exicision and other taboo topics. The schedule I set up is pretty tight, but I hope I can make it work. This culture isn't known for it's promptness. This will take up a good portion of my time during the week.

The morning's I dedicate working at the maternity, doing vaccinations or sensibilizations in other villages, and/or meeting with community leaders. I teach one hour of English on Sundays and I meet with the Committee of Health and health agents each once a month. Sunday from 11-2 is my time, however. That's when I go to Tabou and make phone calls to family and friends. That time, and this time that I take to write, is my time to vent or speak English normally to people I know.

I miss material things less and less. The loss of the camera didn't excite me because it didn't have any good photos on it and it was old. Getting on the internet doesn't really thrill me unless I see a note left by someone on the blog.

Being forced to budget is a new experience that's rather humbling. I like it for that. Being single in the military, I never had to worry about my budget, but here it's a must. If I want to do the things I want to do, I put aside the planned amount needed and make sure it's not touched. The feeling of wanting to buy something, but can't keeps you grounded pretty quickly. I think I really needed that after the military. It also deliniated the needs and wants pretty quickly and you end up doing without the wants a lot easier than you realize. Once the wants are out of reach, they become nominal and you find easy fillers to take their place until they become needs.

My needs right now are health, friends and family. Not in that particular order, but that's what I need; everything else is just filler. My wants are music, art and a cold diet coke. I've got 2 out of 3. That ain't bad!

Am I happy with my job? Not yet, I haven't really done anything to change things here for the better. Once I see some results, maybe, I'll tell you then.

Am I happy with my life? That's a tough one to explain. At this point in my life, I'm very happy to be where I'm at, but I'm not done yet, so I can't judge my life by this point. I consider myself one of the luckiest people in the world to be doing what I want to be doing with the support of my family and friends that I have. The fact I've avoided almost all office work in my life is amazing and I hope to continue to do so.:) I don't hate computers, I just hate the idea of doing anything remotely like work on them. PowerPoint is of the Devil!! Say it with me....Good. Now, go outside and be one with nature. He He! Just kidding. Get back to work!!

Hope you have an excellent holiday season. Take care
Love, Laura

Letter to Mom&Dad - Nov 15

Everytime I wonder if I should stay and sit this thing out, God seems to give me a gift or an incentive to stay. There's a book I told you about that gives a pretty convincing argument on why all this aid (money and aid workers) should stop and get the hell out of Africa. The book discusses this travelers experiences traveling from Cairo to Capetown and his observations along the way.

There is an industry of charity in Africa that is too firmly entrenched. Aid groups come in, give money, leave or stay and continue to give money for a while, but do no training. Foreign aid workers come in and try to fill gaps of missing teachers, doctors and highly trained jobs while the people who are from Africa get trained in the same job and leave to a western country to work instead. I'd say at least 85% of the conversations I've had with men about my age group have entailed the following "You and me need to get married and go back to America" - "Will you pay for my ticket to America, I'll pay you back" - "I'm going to America someday, will you help me?"

They tell me these things like a priest at a confessional and they been waiting from someone from a "white country" to help them. After reading the book Dark Star Safari by Paul Theroux, I don't put up with that anymore. I tell them "I'm not staying here long. 2 years is nothing, after I leave you gotta do this yourself. I'm here to help and give ideas, not to do the work for you. Get it? I don't give out money, but I'll help you look for ways to earn it."

To the chaps who want to leave, I just tell them "No, and you don't know how good of a country you're in. This country IS improving and not many African countries can say that. This country is one of the very few who is better off than it was 20 years ago, most are worse."

Typically when I give either of those speils, the men shake their heads in disappointment and the women listening nod in agreement. I've had only one women of all of the women I talk to say that they want to leave. Women are such the backbone and legs of this country; the men are blind to it.

I have found a few people, just a few, who I think really care about improving their community without filling their pockets first. I'm just now starting to get to know them and I hope I can create something sustainable with them while I'm here. They are the few who I think are worth it. Anyway, I know Peace Corps seems like any other aid group, but to be honest, it is one of the better, in regards of providing skills that are transferrable and requiring sustainable projects to be our goal instead of a quick cash flow. I'm sure to be biased, but I also thinke Peace Corps needs to leave Burkina in the next ten years.

Anyway, the little reminder that kept me motivated to stay was a simple walk through the village around sunset. It seemed like a really pretty place for once. The slant of the sun, the greens and browns waving in the wind. The rhythmic grinding and mashing of maise along each household. I'm beginning to like it more here, but when I leave, I want to leave believing that these folks don't need me or anyone's help anymore. It's lofty, but it's more realistic and helpful to save lives that way than to want to stay and to the work myself.
Love, Laura

Letter to Grandma - Nov 13

Hey Grandma! How's it going? I hope the weather hasn't turned too cold for you. How's the new chair doing? Zipping around like crazy? Don't run any of the grandchildren over. I know there are tons running around, so be careful. I bet they just love your new contraption too. If I were you, I'd start charging a quarter for a ride. Their parents may not like it, but who cares, you've got a great new toy to play with. Enjoy!

I'm getting settled into my village. It's been a little over 3 weeks here and I'm getting to know the locals and learning the local language called Moore'. Learning that and French at the same time isn't easy, but the folks here are nice and generally patient with my poor language.

My health has been good lately and I've gained all the weight I initially lost when I got here. My weeks are filled with working at the local clinics, biking to adjacent villages to either give vaccinations or train villages on improving their health. It's not easy, but it's worthwhile.

There's 2 seasons here. The Dry and the Wet season. That's it. It rains for about 3 months and for the other 9 months, no rain. It's kinda weird to think it's not going to rain for another 7 months but that's how it is. Hopefully, water won't get too scarce. It shouldn't be a problem, I think. No one here seems concerned.

Sometimes I kinda like how I know there's going to be a sunny day ahead, gives me less reason to complain. Miss you a bunch, Take care
Laura

Letter to Brad and Margaret Nov 15 -Rcvd Dec 6 05

Dear Margaret and Brad,
Hey Guys, how's it going? I've got ink stains on my hands from a permanent marker. Today was another day of vaccinations but today we rode through the countryside going door to door to give out drops of Polio vaccination and Vitamin A supplements. It's kinda of a daunting idea if you look at the big picture of the logistics of planning and carrying out a vaccination of this sort. There are so many levels of infrastructure to support sucha a plan but people carry it out nonetheless.

We were given our smocks and cooler box to keep the vaccination cold. We organized the regions surrounding each village and assigned teams to tackle a certain retgion everyday and another a different day. My team of two is doing region 1 of the village Toebila which is about 15km outside of To. We're working in coordination with 3 other teams in Toebilla for the next 2 days, while there are about 15 teams total working throughout and around To also. The difficulties are coordination, education and supplies.

Yesterday, we tried to gather all the teams to coordinate the vaccinations. We started 2 hours late and many people didn't show. Explaining the procedure to new volunteers who have minimal education background is also an obstacle especially when you need for them to fill out forms and they're illiterate. 3rdly, going door to door isn't liek a normal neighborhood. There's no definitive streets, signs, or maps that depict exact locations of anyhome. You ask a household set apart "Where are your neighbors?" they'll point vaguely in one direction or another and off you go to find them and you have no idea how many they are. We came to one courtyard, it had 20 children, all under the age of 5. That's one "family". Another had none.
We ran out of vaccine before we finished our region and will try to complete it and the next region tomorrow.

As I talked to people, they seem to believe there's a gradual moving of the population south. Probably due to the previous famines in the north and the more stabel harvests here. However, the infrastructure is at its limit. With the growing # there isn't enough wells or pumps to support everyone, especially the smaller villages that are growing the most rapid. One town has only one well to support over 500 people, when it's late in the dry season this coudl become disastrous if there hadn't been a good rainy season previously.

I'm doing a regional study and the potential information to be gathered is incredible. I foresee doing an initial draft and adding on supplements throughtout my 2 years.
One interesting note, some of the houses we had been to were empty of small children. They were allready out in the fields working. Some of the children, I've seen, working in fields, taking care of stock, caring for other infants, have only been like 3 or 4, I swear. They play, but they also work as hard as anything I've seen. I guess they figure, these kids are able, might as well earn their dinner. It doesn't shock me anymore but I still try to imagine Andrew, Michelle or little Joe being given such responsibilities and can't. Is this because we expect too little of our children or too much? I'm sure Brad will have Clara sanding and painting in no time. :)
I'll let you go, Take care.
Love Laura